Resources for parents of at-risk and troubled teens.



September 2010

Parents Fighting, How to Deal With It?

by Staff, on adults arguing, at risk blog, at risk youth, dealing with parents fighting, parents arguing, parents fighting

Most of teenagers fight with their parents, but what happens when parents fight between each other? In most cases teens dread the thought, it is very hard dealing with parents fighting and yelling at each other. Unfortunately most teenagers don’t know how to deal with this situation and they start having all sorts of ideas, like parents not loving each other anymore, or they are getting divorced, teens easily tend to jump to conclusions in this situation. But in most cases it is just a moment of weakness we all have when we lose control, so don’t always assume the worst is happening.

Sometimes it is normal for parents to argue, there are adults stuff that need to be discussed and it can get a bit serious. You only need to start worrying when it starts to get personal in the argument, when parents start cursing at each other and start threatening. If you hear them arguing about job choices, or other parent responsibilities don’t assume the worst just yet, it is not pleasant to hear your parents arguing, but it’s not the end of the world and it doesn’t mean that they don’t love each other.

But, there is the case when the argument does go too far. You will know if your parent’s argument has gone too far if one parent threatens the other to injure himself or herself, talks about committing suicide, talks about leaving and getting a divorce, or when parents start fighting, hitting, breaking and destroying things. This is when the situation is definitely out of control and when things can get really serious.

The hardest thing most kids cope with is when the argument between parents is about their child, which can drive most teens out of their mind. One thing you have to understand is that you are never responsible for your parents fighting, that is their fault, not yours. The first thing you need to do if the fighting is upsetting you and causing trouble for you is to talk to your parents, in most cases parents don’t even realize how that is influencing their children.

Maybe a better option is to talk to another family member and tell him all about the situation. The bottom line is that if things get out of control you need to let someone know about the situation, parents, other family members, teachers, school counselor or any other adult that may help in this situation.

Parents arguing comes and goes and it is a part of family, you have to understand that every family has its ups and downs, if you look at it from that perspective you will realize that it is not something unusual, and if it doesn’t cross the above mentioned boundaries you don’t have much to worry about. Staff